Metallica are one of the biggest bands in the world, but that hasn’t made James Hetfield immune to very human emotions.
Speaking on an episode of the band's official podcast, The Metallica Report, Hetfield says he suffered nightmares of malfunctioning guitars ahead of their latest world tour, leading to anxiety and imposter syndrome.
“I start to doubt myself, [thinking] ‘We're old, we can’t do this,’" he said, (transcribed by Metal Injection).
“I was having nightmares about how I’m the only one who cares about what we're doing here: ‘Where is everybody?’
“The guitar neck is made of rubber, and there are only two strings on it. ‘Where's my roadie?’ and the guitar cord won’t let me get to the microphone. Silly stuff like that.”
There is – to his credit – an acceptance from Hetfield, adding that it’s “part of the [touring] cycle; it just is. You have anxiety build up, and don’t let it get the best of you because of you. And as soon as you get up there, it’s all gonna be good.”
Hetfield has previously talked about his struggles on and off stage. He admitted to a 60,000-strong crowd in Brazil in 2022 that he felt “insecure” about his guitar playing that night.
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He said he felt like “an old guy”, and that he “can't play anymore”, before admitting it was all “bullshit that I tell myself in my head” – but those dark thoughts had crept into his mind regardless.
Last year, he told Apple Music about the weight on his shoulders when it came to fronting the tour on the Black Album tour in the face of the record's dizzying success.
“There was such an expectation already on myself to not let the team down and be the best possible,” he said. “But then you add 60,000 people out there... You need to be what they need you to be because this is what you've evolved to be.”
“Off tour, it's like, ‘Who am I?’ Like any first responder, football player, or soldier, you take your uniform off and you're a civilian again. I don't know who I am.’ There was a lot of fear in that.”
Despite his insecurities, Hetfield is regarded by many as the undisputed master of metal rhythm guitar.
For Mastodon’s Bill Kelliher, meeting his idol pushed him to improve his craft. Echoing that sentiment, Alter Bridge and Creed guitarist Mark Tremonti said he “wouldn't be here right now if it wasn't for Master of Puppets” and Hetfield’s ultra-aggressive downpicking style.
Metallica’s latest world tour, in support of its new album, 72 Seasons, got off to a headline-worthy start as the band battled torrential rain and thunderstorms in Munich.
The tour takes the band through Finland, Denmark, and Norway this month, before headlining Hellfest in France. The band will then play the US, Canada, and Mexico in August and September.
Head to Metallica’s site for the full venue and ticket details.